C’était le jour de la rentrée, déjà. Comme chaque année, les vacances étaient passées bien trop vite à ton goût, mais peu importe : aujourd’hui, tu venais de retourner à Ilukaan, ton école mais aussi ce qui était devenu avec le temps, ta deuxième maison. A vrai dire, tu étais presque nostalgique, aujourd’hui : tu débutais ta dernière année d’études. Quel sentiment étrange, de savoir que ce serait la dernière fois que tu assisterais à ce spectacle. Lire la suite
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ĪŅCØŘŔËCŤ ÍŁŮĶĀĂÑ
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— Strixyst
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ϟ Œuvre : OC
ϟ Parchemins : 209
Re: ĪŅCØŘŔËCŤ ÍŁŮĶĀĂÑ Sam 11 Aoû - 2:02

Je sais pas quand m'arrêter......... Du coup ça donne ça.
....dsl

Arthur: Francis and I are dating.
Keith, Kenneth, Mabel, Karkat and Francis: [gasp]
Arthur: Francis, why are YOU surprised?

***

Mabel: Goodnight honey!
Connor: Goodnight mommy.
Mabel: Goodnight monster that eats children who are bad!
Kenneth: [through radio under the bed] GOODNIGHT!

-Connor c’est l’un des enfants de Kenneth et Mab, au cas où-

***

[shopping at Target]
Karkat: [scanning the shelves]
Karkat: [looks around, then at a customer] Have you seen my husband?
Customer: [shakes their head]
Karkat: MARCO!
Dave: [from nearby] POLO!
Karkat: [looks at customer] That came from the juice aisle, didn’t it?

***

Wendy: Girls like mysterious guys.
Kenneth: Got it.
[later]
Mabel: Where are we going?
Kenneth: It’s none of your business!

***

Renji: Sold my mattress on eBay a couple nights back so I had some money to buy a pet.
Renji: My back? Stiff.
Renji: Byakuya? Mad.
Renji: My iguana? Sick as fuck.

***

Alfred: Luciano is on a cruise so while he’s gone I’m gonna cut the sleeves off of all my shirts.
Arthur: Why?
Alfred: He’s pretty much 85% of my impulse control.

***

Karkat: Mother fucker!
Kenneth: Dude there’s kids here!
Karkat:
Karkat: Mommy fucker?
Arhur: NO.

***

Keith: Have you asked Mabel out yet?
Kenneth: Well, technically not yet but in my mind we already have children.

***

Mads I know this is not gonna sound how I mean it to sound…
Mads: I wanna fuck this pizza.
Alfred: I get it.
Alfred: You should never say that to anyone else…
Alfred: But, I get it.

***

Mabel: Admit it Kenny. You’ve fallen for me.
Kenneth: I didn’t fall for you, Mab. You fucking tripped me.

***

Mabel: Gabe I don’t care what you say. I love Kenneth and I’m still going to marry him even if you don’t like him.
Gabriel: Really? [to Kenneth] This makes me like you even less.
Kenneth: That’s okay I’m not really a fan of myself either.

***

[during the “carry your partner” portion of a race]
Tomislav: [carries Thandi bridal-style, jogs a little and talks calmly with her]
Renji: [sprints past, carries Morgan over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes; they’re both screaming]

***

Angela: Jesse, you’re a genius!
Jesse: Yeah, I get called that a lot.
Angela: What, a genius?
Jesse: No, Jesse

***

[Cirilla accidentally tells Feliciano’s secret]
Feliciano: You promised not to tell!
Karkat: Hitler promised not to invade Czechoslovakia, Feliciano. Welcome to the real world.

***

Renji: I would do anything for you.
Morgan: Tell me my hair is cooler than yours.
Renji: I would do almost anything for you.

***

Kenneth: Where’s Mabel?
Keith: Don’t worry about her.
Kenneth: Oh I’m sorry, have you met me?

***

Morgan: Did you just fall?
Renji: No. I attacked the floor.
Morgan: Backwards?
Renji: I’m freaking talented.

***

Arthur: On a scale from 1 to 10, you’re a 9…and I’m the 1 you need.
Francis: No wtf I’m a 10.

***

Mabel: I’m cold
Kenneth: Here, take my jacket
Dave: Hey, I’m cold too
Karkat: What???? [taking off jacket] I told you to bring more layers but of course you didn’t listen and now [piling scarves on him] now look, I’ve got to make sure you don’t FREEZE to death and [taking somebody else’s hat] how long have you been cold and why you didn’t say something sooner????

***

Alfred: Do you ever see something that changes your life?
Luciano: I saw you.
Alfred: Honestly that’s so sweet and it really makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a picture of a cute dog dressed up as a bunny.

***

Damianos: I’m sorry I’m late, I got caught up doing things.
Laurent: [strodes into the room with a smirk on his face] I’m things

***

Gabriel: I wasn’t that drunk last night.
Angela: You were flirting with Jack last night.
Gabriel: So? He’s my boyfriend.
Angela: You asked if he was single.
Angela: And cried when he said he wasn’t.

***

Angela, after placing her hands over Gabriels eyes: Guess who!
Gabriel: It’s either Angela or the cold, clammy hands of death.
Angela: It’s Angela!
Gabriel: Damnit.

***

[after Angela gave Lucio some protective gears for when he is roller-skating]
Lucio: That helmet looks kind of lame.
Angela: You know what’s not lame? Safety.

***

Kiku, whispering to Arthur: Tell him “You have beautiful eyes”.
Arthur: That’s good, great idea.
Arthur, turning to Francis: I have beautiful eyes.

***

Jesse: *playing out of tune guitar*
Hanzo: You take requests?
Jesse: Sure
Hanzo: Please stop

***

Renji: Romeo and Juliet is a love story, right?
Angelina: Romeo and Juliet is NOT a love story. It is a tragedy about how young love is stupid and shortsighted.
Byakuya: Romeo and Juliet is indeed a tragedy, but the love between the two stars is not stupid or shortsighted - it is genuine and beautiful. The tragedy comes from the fact that the rivalry between the Capulets and the Montagues destabilizes their community and kills two innocent kids who loved each other.
Morgan, walzting into room sipping wine: *snort* Mercutio is gay.

***

Francis: From now on we'll be using code names. You can address me as Eagle One.
Francis: Gabriel, codename "Been there, done that".
Francis: Arthur is "Currently doing that".
Francis: Kenneth is "It happened once in a dream".
Francis: Keith, codename "If I had to pick a dude".
Francis: Mabel is "Eagle Two".
Mabel: Oh, thank god.

***

Lucio: Luciel, you deserve an award for putting up with me
Luciel: You are my award, Lucio
Gabriel: Jack, you deserve an award for putting up with me
Jack: Hell yeah I do, you're a real bitch sometimes

***

Mabel: [quietly reading her book, listening to classical music, very focused]
Kenneth: [upside down in library chair] Do you think stars have feelings?

***

Keith: Francis, would you do me the honor of becoming my brother-in-law?
Arthur: Did you just propose to him…FOR ME?
Keith: Someone had to do it, Arthur!
Kenneth: *nodding vigorously in the background*

***

Luciano: Tomorrow is garbage day
Karkat: I can’t believe they have an entire day dedicated to you

***

Kenneth: Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate just one time.
Keith: Maybe you should go the fuck to sleep.

***

Mabel: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you had lost throughout your life.
Arthur: It would be nice to get my sense of purpose back.
Kenneth: Oh wow, my childhood happiness! Thank you for finding this.
Gabriel: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years!
Jesse: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.
Karkat: Mental stability, my old friend.
Jack: My innocence, what a surprise.
Mabel: Guys, could you lighten up a little?

***

Policeman: What're your names?
Renji: don't tell him, Morgan
Policeman [writing down]:  Morgan
Renji: shit
Morgan: good job, Renji
Policeman:
Morgan: oh fuck

***

Luciano: Can't you compliment me just once?
Karkat: You have amazing determination and willpower
Luciano: Wow, thank y-
Karkat: -to be this stupid
Luciano:
Luciano: I'll take it.

***

Kiku: What are you looking at?
Arthur, taking a Buzzfeed quiz to find out which holiday candle scent he is: Porn.

***

Wendy: I don’t have the energy for this.
Mabel: For what?
Wendy: *gestures vaguely*

***

Arthur: Why are you looking at me?
Francis: Because you are beautiful.
[A moment later.]
Francis: And you are looking at me, too. Is it because I am beautiful...
Arthur: No.
Francis: ...glorious, wonderful...
Arthur: I said NO.
Francis: ...lovely, hands-
Arthur: AAaah, yes. Just be quiet.

**

Lance: Bro, tell me your scariest horror story.
Kenneth: Life without you bro.
Lance: Bro.

***

Mabel: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Kenneth asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight.
[later]
Kenneth: What kind of animal is the pink panther?
Mabel, already taking off her clothes: Kenneth, you’re so fucking stupid.



Y a des jolis aes là-dessous ♥:
 
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— Cervirald
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ϟ Œuvre : Axis Powers Hetalia
ϟ Parchemins : 327
Re: ĪŅCØŘŔËCŤ ÍŁŮĶĀĂÑ Dim 12 Aoû - 15:11

Byakuya : So Renji sneezed and instead of saying "bless you" i accidentally said "shut the fuck up"‬
Francis : How do you accidentally say "shut the fuck up"?‬

***

Laurent: I’m a confident driver
Damen: you almost ran someone over?
Laurent: confidently

***

Mabel: The stars are so beautiful
Kenneth: they're just giant balls of gas
Mabel: don't ruin the momen-
Kenneth: and yet none of them are as huge as my love for you
Mabel *choking up*: oh

***

Morgan: See this? This is my “I don’t care” face.
Thandi: That’s your everyday face.

***

Soma: My throat was so dry, I thought I wouldn’t be able to talk.
Arthur: At least some good would have come from the drought then.

***

Ciri : Have you ever been yelled at by Yennefer?
Student: I’m not afraid of her.
Ciri: So that’s a no.

***

Karkat: You like me? You like my personality?
Dave: I was surprised too.

***

Alfred: Guys, let me ask you a question. Can you two agree on anything?
Luciano: Yes.
Karkat: Not really.
Alfred: Great.

***

Jack: Is that your hand on my ass?
Gabriel: It was an accident.
Jack: Gabriel, your hand’s still on my ass.
Gabriel: IT’S STILL AN ACCIDENT.

***

Kenneth: No but are you sure you love me, like really sure, I don’t want to pressure you.
Mabel: We have been married for 23 years.

***

Francis: Arthur, you're drunk.
Arthur: I am not drunk.
Francis: Oh, yeah, tell the time.
Arthur: *points at clock* I am not drunk!

***

Francis: *passing by* *sees Arthur staring* Enjoying the show?
Arthur: Are you always this cocky?
Francis: Only on Tuesdays... and whenever beautiful men are involved.
Arthur: So, you think I'm beautiful?
Francis: Actually, it's Tuesday.

***

Damen: Feels like you're being a little harsh.
Zak: Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh, I'll turn it up.

***

Renji: Let's get one thing straight.
Byakuya: ?
Renji : i'm not.

***

Jesse : I can fit my whole world in the palm of my hands
Hanzo : that’s impos-
Jesse : *cups Hanzo’s face*
Hanzo : *blushing* I have a reputation

***

Keith K. : i love you
Francis: is that you or the firewhisky talking? *amused*
Keith K. : it's me talking to the firewhisky

***

Lance: I’m such a hopeless bromantic.
Kenneth: Uh, what?
Lance: Like, high five me in the rain, fist bump me gently as the sun sets.

***

Luciano : Is this whiskey or perfume?
Alfred: *chugs the entire bottle*
Alfred: It’s perfume.

***

Student : I like your glasses
Tenya : i'm afraid they're not for sale
Student : haha
Tenya : laugh all you want, they are not for sale

***

Mads : I wasn't that drunk last night!
Kenneth : You were flirting with Berwald...
Mads : So? He's my boyfriend.
Kenneth : You asked him if he was single and then cried when he said he wasn't.

***

Arthur: *catches Francis staring at him*
Arthur: What are you doing?
Francis: Just admiring raw beauty.
Arthur: Well stop it.
Francis: Okay..
Francis: *turns over to look at girls*
Arthur: UHH, I THINK THE FUCK NOT!!!

***

Damen: *takes a deep breath*
Damen: I lo-
Anyone who has spent five seconds around him ever: Yes, you love Laurent, we know, you love Laurent so much, you love hiiiim so fucking much, you just love Laurent, WE KNOW, you love Laurent! You fucking love Laurent! Okay, we know, we get it, YOU LOVE LAURENT. WE GET IT.

***

Laurent: I’m very upset and nothing can make me feel better right now.
Byakuya:
Laurent: No.
Francis:
Laurent: Guys, don’t.
Francis and Byakuya: *brings Damen into the room*
Laurent: *fighting back a smile* Dammit.

***

Kenneth: So, let me get this straight-
Damen: More like let me run this bi you.
Francis: Let’s just see how this pans out.
Mikasa: We should ace-ess the situation.
Morgan: I’m gay.

***

Francis: What do you find is the most attractive thing about boys?
Morgan: Usually, their girlfriends.

***

Karkat: STRIIIIIDEEERRR!
Dave, tearing up: You’re so beautiful and so fucking loud

***

*ordering a cake for Francis’s birthday over the phone*
Salesman: What would you like the cake to say?
Alfred: *covers phone and turns to Luciano*
Alfred: I-I didn’t know cakes could talk.

***

Mads: Hey Ciri, do you have Yennefer’s number? I kinda wanna, you know.. *hip thrust*
Ciri: … Yennefer is my mom.
Mads: yeah no shit, that’s probably why you have her number.

***

Hana: Why are you so strong?
Genji: I grew up with a older brother.
Genji: Someone had to protect him.

***

Kiku: All in all, a 100% successful trip!
Ciri: We lost Feliciano!
Kiku: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

***

Damen: Laurent is really nice person underneath the part of him that hates everyone.

***

Thandi: I’m not obsessed with Tomislav Kovačević !
Angelina/Morgan (well, more like les joueuses N'EST-CE PAS) :
Spoiler:
 




De la part des potos:
 
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— Cervirald
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ϟ Œuvre : Homestuck
ϟ Parchemins : 515
Re: ĪŅCØŘŔËCŤ ÍŁŮĶĀĂÑ Dim 12 Aoû - 23:56

Allez, une spéciale "Homestuck quotes" car j'ai envie.

____________

Feliciano : Shucks!!!!!
Gabriel : Hey, I'm upset about it too, but let's watch the fucking language.

____________

Alfred, studying : so i built this sick pyramid of books to help focus my brain chi and spiritual majyyks and if at all possible to blitz my chakras out the yin yang
Luciano : is it working?
Alfred : no

____________

Arthur: FRANCIS FUCK OFF
Arthur: AND BY FUCK OFF I MEAN FUCK OFF RIGHT BACK HERE AND LISTEN, YOU INSUFFERABLE PRICK.

____________

Kenneth : If I agree to confess to her, will you stop tormenting me about it??
Francis: yes
Francis: but only
Francis: because that will be impossible for me to do
Francis: when u + her r snoggin hard in motherfuckin makeout paradise
Francis: A K A SEX LAND

___________

Jack, to Gabe : I Am Not Scared Of You!
Jack : None Of Us Are!
Isaac : (i kind of am)
Jack : Isaac Shut Up!

__________

Hanzo: Why am I being stupid??
Hanzo: I think I've spent too much time around Genji.
Hanzo: I've also probably spent too much time sharing his genes.

__________

Francis : Come on, now tell her a poem !
Kenneth, panicking : Your eyes are an ocean
Kenneth : Your breast
Kenneth : Are also an ocean

__________

Mabel : Are you sober enough to do all that?
Morgan : i think
Morgan : the answer
Morgan : unfortunately
Morgan : is yes
Morgan : :/

_________

Certaines ont été modifiées des originales, juste pour ajouter un contexte ou coller un peu plus.


❝STOP TRYING TO ONE-UP ME ON FAILURE, I HAVE THE CORNER MARKET.❞
    Karkat Vantas
   (c)Allison
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— Strixyst
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ϟ Œuvre : Axis Power, Hetalia
ϟ Parchemins : 53
Re: ĪŅCØŘŔËCŤ ÍŁŮĶĀĂÑ Mar 14 Aoû - 18:40

Thandi : WHY EVERYONE SO HOT ???
Morgan : Climate change.


Feliciano ne s'arrête jamais de parler en #006BA9
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